Splitting the Ironies into Three

1. Mom was left-handed. When her body began to betray her, it was her left hand that contracted first. Over the last few years, she had to learn to use her right hand for basic things like eating.
2. Mom was a communicator. She earned a MA in Language Arts from the University of Iowa. For 40 years, her expertise was being able to communicate. Now, when I see her, she cannot communicate. She looks at me but it's like she can't see me.
3. This is a delicate subject. This paragraph that you are now reading is the result of several drafts. It is ironic that I am the one in close proximity as Mom completes her final journey on Earth because for numerous reasons that I find no value in drudging up, I can't say that I was as close to her for a number of years.

Hospice

Sigh.

I've been spending the last few days watching the Lord take Mom to heaven. I sit by the bed and watch her breathing, looking for a change in the pattern. Sometimes, the kids, Karen, Dad, and family friends are in the room, but most of the time, I find myself wondering how to be.

I don't know when the end will come for her, but I am willing to sit by her bed and wait with her. I think about all the ironies.

Next post.

Too Sweet

This is totally sweet!

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Lost in Translation

Brian Henderson on the Techwr-L list shared this photo:

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Awesome Lineup

If it were possible to make it to a festival in 2015, I think Northern Invasion would be in the running as my top pick. It's a one day show, it has some outstanding bands that I've never seen before, like Slipknot, Volbeat, Halestorm, The Pretty Reckless, Anthrax (the only band in the Big Four I've never seen live), and Young Guns.

That said, the 2015 edition of Rock on the Range, the 3 day concert on May 15, 16 & 17 at Columbus Crew Stadium in Ohio, has a pretty sweet lineup too. Once again, lots of bands I've never seen before. Of the first 7 bands listed, only Godsmack and Breaking Benjamin are bands I've seen before.
I'm flabbergasted and, of course, I have already found out it is a 9 hour drive from my house to Columbus, OH. Mark my words - someday, this will be a father / kids trip with Megan & Alex.

Nice Collections

From Missoula, MT:

• I am selling my entire collection of cd's. 20+ years of collecting. There is about 330 of them. The collection consists mostly of hip-hop, metal, alternative, punk, funk, and rock. Cd's and cases are in great shape. Some are very rare! You must take all. Will not split up. And I will not ship these you must pick them up. $299.00 FIRM that's less than $1 a cd! Some aren't pictured. Need these gone. I will include the rack if you want it. Thanks.

From Austin, TX:

• I am selling collection as entire set, not seperate CDs. - $3 ~ $4 per cd
  Sorry, I do not have a list I can send you as it would take forever to type.
  You are welcome to come see the collection personally for yourself.
  Former DJ retiring and liquidating my CD collection.
  perfect for someone wanting to start a DJ business or someone who wants to have an instant amazing musical collection. ALL types of music:
• Rock
• Country
• Classical
• Disco
• Hip Hop
• Rap
• Ethinic
• Jazz
• Heavy Metal
• Karaoke
• Christian
• Pop
• Soul
• Funk
• Motown
• Techno
• 50's
• 60's
•  70's
•  80's 
• 90's
• ..and MANY MANY more.

Nice Set

From Craigslist, I like this set, but not enough to plop down $2350 in cash for it.
LUDWIG VISTALITE DRUM SET & HARDWARE - $2350 (Northern Virginia) OVER $3,850.00 WORTH OF EQUIPMENT

• Ludwig Vistalite set -- Unblemished
• 22x16" Bass Drum
• 12x13" Tom
• 13x14" Tom
• 16x16" Floor Tom
• 5x14" Pearl Chad Smith Signature Snare
• Tom mounts, snare stand, and Hi-Hat stand included
• Axis AAX-X single bass drum pedal
• Heavy duty boom stands (x2)
• Medium duty boom stands (x2)
• Medium duty stands (x2)
• Ludwig Rims System on Rack Toms
• All Bottom rims and tension rods that are not present in pictures included

Opportunity to Go to the Next Level

Do I remain or rise? From a local Craigslist ad:
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8 Seconds is now looking for a drummer to start in Feb, 2015. Someone who is familiar with newer top 40 country, some traditional and classic rock. We are looking for someone who is ready to make some new memories in 2015. Schedule can be hectic at times but worth it. Must be able to travel some and able to commit. We work hard to achieve a specific sound and that is what we are looking to keep moving forward. Please contact Mike to set up an audition at the email listed or call. Looking forward to hearing from you.
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These guys are SERIOUS about playing. Their website has a list of recent dates:

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Upcoming Shows

Wild Hogs - 11/07 @ 8pm - Walford, IA
Spencer Fall Festival - Annual Fall Festival ( Indoors) @ 9pm - Spencer, IA
Meskwaki Lounge - 11/14 & 11/15 @ 8:30pm - Tama, Iowa
Solon Firemans Dance - 11/22 @ 8pm - Solon, Iowa
Cocktails - 11/26 @ 8pm (Thanksgiving Eve) - Cedar Rapids, Iowa
Tailgators - 12/06 9:30pm-12:30am - Cedar Rapids, Iowa
Rumors Bar - 12/19 @ 9pm - Cedar Rapids, Iowa
Wildwood Saloon - 12/20 @ 9pm - Iowa City, Iowa

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They have dates in 2015 already:

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2015 CREEK FEST MUSIC FESTIVAL - 8 Seconds is honored to say that we have been invited to perform in this years Creek Fest that is held every year in Cherokee, Iowa. This years big names are The Band Perry on Friday and Saturday Night we will be opening up for Big N Rich. Tickets go on sale November 7 so get them while they last. Check them out on the web at www.creekfestiowa.com.
8 Seconds RETURNS to Bobbers Grill - YES!!!! We are officially back and booked at Bobbers Grill in North Liberty @ Scales Point Campground. Its been a couple of years so we are excited to return. Book your campsites now because we will be playing August 22, 2015 which is the Salute To Summer. Show is 6pm-10pm and no admission. See you all there!

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Obviously, this is an Ideal Band where the set list is already defined and after some initial practices to get up to speed, how much rehearsing would there be? Here's a link to a playlist - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_iZAyFIqo_GK4BQbaBNSfA/feed?activity_view=3 and here's some other videos.

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Folsom Prison

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Ticks

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Walk Softly

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In Color

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Lot of Leavin' (Left to Do)

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How About You

Drummer Joke

Phil, my friend, sent me this joke:

Wether is the Challenge

The blessing and the curse of being employed as a technical writer surfaced again when I read this article. Perhaps the the challenge is to find a way to eliminate typos as they tend to be embarising.

TLC PPV Recap

After reading the results of the TLC WWE PPV on Sunday, I don't think the Creative Team that writes the script - what? the wrestlers don't speak what they think / feel? - has a clue about what they are doing.

Seriously.

First, the Big Show is a good guy, then he's bad, then he says it was all a mistake, and then he shows up during the main event on Sunday and KO's John Cena.

Huh?

Please, correct the rudderless Big Show. He's one of my favorites.

Master Sync has Been Turned Off

It wasn't something I said that turned off the Master Sync on my phone. Apparently, I pressed the Sync button that this video shows to disable the email sync between my phone and hotmail.com email account.

Nick Menza and Deth

So, here's a thought. The drummer and guitarist in Megadeth leave. To me, the best era in Megadeth is when they released "Rust in Peace" in 1990. That release is simply awesome. Marty Friedman played guitar and Nick Menza played drums on that release. The speculation on sites like Blabbermouth.net is that Friedman and Menza could return to the band. That would be extremely awesome. Maybe. It would depend upon if they could come up with material as awesome as the material from "Rust in Peace." Here's a video of Nick Menza playing along to "Holy Wars." The sick thing about this video is that I could hum along the words, even though you can't hear Dave Mustaine singing.

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But then again, I love this entire album.

I Have Goosebumps

After I posted my previous post, I started looking through regional Craigslist ads for a drummer. I came across this one, based in Des Moines, that seems to be in line with what I've described when I have described an "Ideal Band" in the past. I'm not all that keen on the "dress up like the 80s" idea, but the description has my attention. Do your homework, get together and tighten up right before the gig. Wow.

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Looking for Bassist and drummer for 80's pop tribute
BURNING DOWN THE HOUSE

Des Moines' premier 80's pop tribute band is seeking a bass player and drummer.
We play 3-4 high profile shows a year. We are possibly looking to play more if the money is right.
We dress in the pop 80's fashion and play covers by bands such as Duran Duran, Men at work. The Cure, Tears for Fears.
We are all seasoned musicians, and are professional, all have other projects and are doing this to make some extra cash and have a blast.
Basically, you learn the tunes and do your homework and we get together a week or so prior to shows to tighten up.
We currently have dates booked for January and February, and some summer shows.
Please contact me ASAP of interested.
Call number,

Cheers
Matt

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A New Bang Toy

Serbi is one of my dear friends. I've known him since fall of 1985 when we met as sophomores in high school on the Kennedy High School marching band field. The story has probably been told on this blog more than once, but it seems when I retell a story, I change a detail or two or add a detail or two. Today, I'm recalling how many drum sets Serbi has owned over the years. When I met him, he had a set of brown Gretch drums that had really deep sounding toms. I loved the tone of those drums. He had a silver Pearl set for a while and then, sadly, I lost track. I played the green set I mentioned in my Facebook post below at Fat Jack's in Cedar Rapids in 2013. Previous to that, I have a dim memory of playing his drums during a song at a Fireman's Dance in Blairstown, a small town west of Cedar Rapids, when he played in a band called Shotgun, but I also kind of remember not knowing what time signature the song was in and messing up.

All that aside, Serbi has a new set of drums, as shown below.

For as many times as I've thought about or wanted a new set of drums, I have not ever purchased either a replacement for or an additional set of drums, disregarding the Yamaha electronic set for Alex. I still have my Ludwig Vistalites and even though I haven't played them since fall of 2013, which is when Lou's Classic Ride began rehearsing at Joe's girlfriend's studio in Iowa City, I really have zero intention of ever selling them. I have joked that if there comes a day when I go to the nursing home, I want these drums to be stacked in a corner so I can look at them. I feel as though they are a part of me, a part of my identity.

I will say that if I could go back in time, I would tell my young self that I should get a second set of drums to use for gigs and such. I would have never taken them out of my house if I had known that now, decades after my parents buying them for me, they would be considered vintage. My drums have been used, to be sure. The floor toms have cracks by the tension thingy and the paint on the bass drum hoop has chipped away a bit. These are little things that I, as a purchaser of drums, would expect to reduce the price of them if they were for sale.

However, they are NOT for sale and will continue to sit, stacked in the furnace room, until I need them. Unfortunately, since Uncle Rico the Band disbanded in August, I haven't been able to find a band to jam with. It's not the first time I've seen this ad:

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WANTED: EXPERIENCED DRUMMER FOR BUSY ROCK BAND (Cedar Rapids)

Cedar Rapids rock band is currently looking for an experienced drummer who can travel and play out every weekend. Must have own vehicle and be dependable. To inquire, please respond to this page and tell us about yourself. This position needs to be filled as soon as possible. Thanks!

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I don't respond to it because I'm not going to travel and I'm not going to play out every weekend. That's just not feasible for me and for where I am in my life journey. Kind of like the Sapwoods, an Iowa City-based band that plays only originals. They wanted someone that could do regional tours and when I said that wasn't really possible, that was the deal killer. I'm really not interested in wasting the Cedar Rapids band's time. 

 

On the same subject, I still think about my audition for Horny Genius in January 1990, when I drove to West Branch and set up my drums in a barn. I remember rocking through the audition and when they turned to me and said, "Do you want to be our drummer," I (once again) would like to go back to that version of me and say, "YES!! SAY YES!!! DON'T DECLINE THIS OFFER!! THEY'RE GOING TO GO TOUR IN EUROPE IN THE FALL AND IF YOU SAY NO, YOU WILL REMAIN IN COLLEGE AND READ DEAD AUTHORS INSTEAD OF TOURING WITH A BAND IN EUROPE!!" As it turned out, I did say "No" and I didn't go tour with them in the fall of 1990. Of course, I've also thought that there's no way to really know if I would still be their drummer when that tour opportunity arose. I like to think I would be, but I'll never really know.

All of these words to simply say Serbi got a new set of drums that look really sweet.

Revolution Saints

Mash Night Ranger, Bad English, and Whitesnake and you get Revolution Saints and I like it! I have often said that the only drummers I know that can sing are Phil Collins and Karen Carpenter. Phil is short and bald while Karen is dead. I am now going to cite Deen Castronova, the drummer and vocalist in the clip below, as being a drummer that can sing.

Low Expectations Exceeded

Karen, her parents, her brother and his wife, and I went to the Circa 21 Dinner Playhouse in Rock Island, IL, to see "White Christmas." I admit two things about the idea before I set foot in the place:

1. I had zero desire to go to any dinner theater
2. I had never seen the movie "White Christmas".

Despite being told "White Christmas" is a classic Christmas movie / story, I really didn't have the urge to see it. I consider "Home Alone" or the National Lampoon's Christmas movie with Chevy Chase to be "classic" Christmas movies. It is the day after seeing the play and, frankly, I get it. I get why "White Christmas" is considered a classic Christmas movie. It has all the elements of what I classify as "holiday spirit" in that its theme is to put others in front of yourself. I could draw parallels to that theme in "Home Alone" and "Christmas Vacation" as I watched it.

After the play was over, the six of us went to the Jumer's casino. Normally, I will spend ~$40 at the blackjack table. I have a "code" that I don't join a game of blackjack in the middle of a game because the cards I get throw off the flow for the other players. I circled around the casino more than once, watching a few hands at each of the tables and had selected a specific table. The dealer wasn't going super fast and was engaging in conversation with the seated players. I liked that in a dealer because the dealer is not there just to do "a job" but are at least putting on the illusion that they want the people at the table to have a good time.

When I returned to watch what looked to be the last few hands, I saw a sequence that deterred me from waiting any longer to sit down. Instead, I watched the seated players "stay" at 18 and 20, which is what I would have done, only to have the dealer turn up a 3, then a 2, then an Ace, then a 2, and then a 3 to get 21. Holy crap, the dealer was getting good cards. That's the specific hand I remember watching and from that I learned if I sat down, I would likely lose my money.

I stepped away, wasted away $7 in slot machines and, from that, walked out with $.49. That was good for me. I sat in a chair and watched a replay of the Iowa Hawkeyes v. Iowa State Cyclone men's basketball game - ISU won - and surfed Craitslist for a desk or an ad for a drummer or drums. Then it was 11:30 PM, which was our agreed upon time to leave. We loaded back into the vehicle and rode home to Blue Grass. On the way home, I began winding down so that by the time I got out of the vehicle, it was like a wave had overtaken me. I plugged in the two air mattresses, said good night to the others and fell asleep within (probably) 10 minutes of my head landing on the pillow. I slept soundly but am anxious to sleep tonight in the bed in our bedroom.

Now *THIS* is a Job Advertisement

Same disclaimer as before - I am not planning to leave my current employer. We use Confluence at work and I happened upon the Atlassian website and came to this listing on their Careers page.

Technical Writer in Austin, TX

Words. Anyone can write them. We're looking for someone that can wield them. At Atlassian, we look at things differently, and that includes the way we communicate technical information to our customers. We know that good writing and software documentation are often not synonymous and are on a mission to change that. We’re on the hunt for a Technical Writer that is passionate about crafting clear, relevant communications that resonate with and respect the user. You’ll deliver a great experience for customers as they discover, use, and retain our product information.

This role actively collaborates with marketing, development, training and support teams to make sure that all of our technical communications have a holistic approach. A big part of your job will be designing both a stellar content strategy and information architecture and then developing it to scale on various related projects. You’ll also be testing and validating our existing content and finding ways to improve it. We’re serious about changing documentation: We also will look to you to recruit and train like-minded writers that also want to improve the state of documentation.

More about you

This job is for someone who thinks bigger than traditional software documentation. You can explain complex features within tiny amounts of product real estate and communicate value in a compelling, clear and effective way. If you have the following traits you will be a great fit: a knack for creatively engaging with audiences (no “me too” stuff), a need to work in a fast-paced environment, excellent project management skills, an ability to challenge yourself and others, and a love of using data to create better results.

You will be delivering a great customer experience, finding, discovering and retaining information. Design the content strategy and information architecture that allows the production of great content to scale and engage with marketing, development, training, design, development and support teams to collaborate on a holistic information experience for our customers. This is not all expected to be intuitive, in fact we want you to test and validate existing content continually experiment and find new ways to improve it and ensure that we are striving to improve upon our current state. You're a good fit if you have a passion for communicating information and frustrated with the state of software help and knowledge. With the ability to engage an audience through creativity and relish working in a fast-paced agile environment you will ideally have experience collecting and understanding analytics and want to make a difference.

More about our team

We understand that the right words, delivered in the right way, can change minds, spark ideas, solve problems, open doors, avoid trouble, form bonds, create joy, rescue, reassure and unlock tremendous potential. As such you have the ability to work with the majority of the Atlassian family!

More about the perks

Our offices are open, highly collaborative and yes, fun! To support you at work (and play) we offer some killer perks: ample time off to relax and recharge, five paid volunteer days a year for your favorite cause, plenty of food and drinks (including beer and bubbly), ergonomic workstations with Aeron chairs, 20% work time for your passion projects, unique ShipIt days, a company paid trip after five years, generous employer-paid insurance coverage for you and your family, 401k matching and more.

More about Atlassian

Software is changing the world, and we’re at the center of it all. With more than 35,000 global customers (including 85 of the Fortune 100) and a highly disruptive business model, we’re advancing the art of team collaboration with products like JIRA, Confluence and HipChat–and we’re just getting started. Driven by honest values, an amazing culture, and consistent revenue growth, we’re out to unleash the potential of every team. From Amsterdam and Austin to Sydney and San Francisco, we’re looking for people who are powered by passion and eager to do the best work of their lives in a highly autonomous yet collaborative, no B.S. environment.

But wait, there's more...

Show us something:

Along with your resume, send or point us to an example of great documentation that you've created.

Spot On

The American Dream was the subject of Bill O'Reilly's Talking Points memo. I think it is worth the 4:10 it takes to watch it so do it now.

Responsibility

I don't plan to leave where I work.

That said, if I were, I would not really consider this position at Channel Fusion in Hiawatha, which is a northern suburb of Cedar Rapids. Here's the full ad, followed by some analytical comments:

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Technical Editor (HTML)
We are an entrepreneurial and private company that provides channel marketing services to Fortune 1000 clients. Our company leverages technology and service solutions to help our clients promote their brand(s) through their independent channel distribution partners. Our solutions are utilized by channel partners to:

• Manage the MDF/Co-op advertising funds
• Build online custom advertising
• Plan local marketing promotions/initiatives to build the brand
• Enroll in SEM, order point of sale collateral, process consumer rebates, etc.

Channel Fusion needs a Technical Editor who can support our client content management pages and functionality. Responsibilities include:

• Create web pages without Dreamweaver or other HTML editor and troubleshoot HTML style issues, tag issues, etc.
• Use light Javascript, jquery to create and implement basic functions on web page.
• Review system integration issues and troubleshoot issues by narrowing down and isolating problems through process of elimination.
• Create documents standard operating procedures (SOPs) with visuals.

Knowledge, Skills, and Abilities:

• Associate’s Degree preferred.
• HTML experience – ability to troubleshoot HTML style and tag issues.
• Understanding of jquery and how to implement some basic functions into a web page.
• Understanding of web basics including redirects, image maps and intermediate HTML proficiency.
• Excellent knowledge of Excel including filters, macros and troubleshooting.
• Understanding of Web and database feeds.
• Familiarity with content management systems.
• Familiarity with a translation system.
• Familiarity with user acceptance testing.

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My first reaction is that, within Dreamweaver, I know there is a menu option that will validate your code. If I was troubleshooting "style issues, tag issues, etc", I would probably fire up DW and paste the existing code into the HTML editor window pane of DW and validate the code to at least give me a starting point. I'd also use the HTML validator that the W3 site has.

My second reaction is that they want a person who understands HTML tags and doesn't believe a proper web page is saving a Word doc as HTML and calling it a web page, which I think is a valid request since "technical" is in the title's position.

Redesign the Den

Sometimes, I envision a cool desk like this in the den but then, because I am aware of my weaknesses, I realize that all those little shelves within the cabinet would soon be full of stuff I probably don't even need. On the Iowa City Craigslist, this desk is listed at $75.

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Then I think about the polar opposite of the above desks and think about a modern desk like the one below. On the Iowa City Craigslist, this desk is listed at $190.

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While either desk would be a great Christmas present, ultimately, I won't end up with either desk. Knowing the way things go in my life, purchasing the desk would lead to a repainting of the den project and that is something, with all that is going on in life at the moment, is not a project I am willing to even risk needing to undertake. Besides, Megan has been talking for years, literally, about painting her room. I don't like to paint, even if I am the one that cleans the brushes and only paints the inside of closets. That project isn't even in the budget at the moment.

Neither is attending Monday Night Raw at the Wells Fargo Arena in Des Moines on Monday, March 16th.

They Are Here

The tickets for the Bush / Theory of a Deadman concert arrived!

Favorite New (to me) Drummer

In my "Metallica" Google Alerts email, there was a link to this video.

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From there, I clicked the user name "MILANRABIJ1999", which took me to the youtube.com page with 172 videos that have been uploaded. The most recent video, from November 27, 2014, is the one below. It features Milan Rabij playing drums & percussion and Jakub Zuber playing guitar.

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Among the many videos I didn't watch, I did watch and like this video of Metallica's "Cyanide" - love how the there are five views of ... okay, I'm just going to say it. Is this a dude or a gal? I don't know.

Frequently Asked Questions Part II

I didn't name my post the other day "Frequently Asked Questions Part I" because I never considered that there would be anything more to write about it.

I was wrong.

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• From Support Rep 1: 
• Please go to the review page. All the photos with yellow dot, are the photos that are printed and used already.
• From Me: 
• Are you going to see that the FAQ page is updated with this information?
• From Support Rep 2: 
• The FAQ page has that info on page 6.
• From Me: 
• But what about on this page: http://groovebook.com/support/faq.html
• From Support Rep 2: 
• I will let our Tech support know, but for current updates please refer to the App and not the website.
• From Me: 
• I am evaluating how the app works and haven’t installed it yet. Your website is the only place I (or any other potential customer) can obtain information about the app prior to installing it.

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At this point, I hope I don't need to have a part III to what should have been a simple fix, especially since the information is on "Page 6" already. To me, it sounds like their content needs to be stored in a central repository - a single source - and use some sort of automation to spit out the applicable content to where existing customers can read the information within the app and where potential customers can read the information on the website.

Blog of Interest

I came across a blog called "Don't hate the player ~ Hate the game. As I was poking around, I realized that I really enjoyed the writing style, especially on the Contact Me page, where she says, "Or just stand at the bottom of the stairs and start yelling "Mom. Mom. Mom. Mom" until I come down and see just what the problem is and feed you cookies."

After reading that, I wanted more wit. One of the posts I read was called The Fuzzy Math of Marriage. Beyond liking the writing style, I specifically related to #2 - You can't keep a scorecard.

Guilty as charged.

It's so easy to do that and the challenge is to not do it.

Explain Please

I need an explanation. When is a free blog on blogspot.com not free? I've never had to pay a single penny to ANYONE for writing my thoughts on this blog. No hosting, no nothing. And yet, this political blog - who happens to be touting Republican views - wants people to donate? 

Frequently Asked Questions

Amy, my co-worker, sits in a different area of my employer's building. I hadn't talked to her in a while. She had twins, a boy and a girl, 10 months ago. I remember that because she said, "They are 10 months old now." She showed me a picture book from GrooveBook, which is a product I had seen on Shark Tank, but forgotten about it. Amy and I had a really nice chat about life.

When I returned to my desk, I pulled up the GrooveBook website and, as I typically do, I found an issue with the text I was reading. This time it was on their FAQ page. That's where I saw this:

Once again, being a technical writer is a blessing and a curse.

Three Seashells

"Demolition Man" is a movie from 1993. I can't count how many times I've watched it. I judge it for what it is. It's an action flick with Sylvester Stallone, Wesley Snipes, and Denis Leary, and it makes a stinging social commentary about our future. One of the coolest parts of the movie is when Sandra Bullock complains that there's no action and she says this in front of a "Lethal Weapon 3" movie poster. The mystery of where the "three seashells" in the bathroom comes from has now been revealed by the movie's screenwriter. I guess I never really thought about that detail, but I found this article about it to be fascinating.

A Decade Has Flown Past Me

From Loudwire:
"Today (Dec. 8) sadly marks the 10th anniversary of Dimebag Darrell's tragic death. Here, we present exclusive tributes to the Pantera legend from Slash, Anthrax's Scott Ian, Godsmack and several more musicians." I just created a Windows Media Playlist of Loudwire's 10 Best Pantera Songs.

RIP.

Hail to the Deth

160 Megadeth guitar riffs in ~20 minutes. Wow.