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Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Three Jokes & a Drummer

During a long-distance train trip, someone got on, pulled a gun, and announced that he and his gang were robbing the train. The train robbers proceeded to take everything of value or possible value that they could find. After they left, one man saw that his wife was still wearing her rings.
“How did you keep them from stealing the rings,” he asked. “I would have thought those would be the first things they would take..”
“I thought so too,” replied the wife, “so I took them off and hid them in my mouth.”
“Gee,” said the husband, “I wish your mother had been here. We could have saved the luggage.”


At Saint Mary's Catholic Church in South Philly they have a weekly husband's-only marriage seminar. At the session last week, the Priest asked Tony, who was approaching his 50th wedding anniversary, to take a few minutes and share some insight into how he had managed to stay married to the same woman all the years.

Tony replied to the assembled husbands, "Well, I've tried to treat her nice and spend money on her, but best of all is that I took her to Italy for our 25th anniversary!"

The Priest responded "Tony, you are an amazing inspiration to all the husbands here! Please tell us what you are planning for your wife for your 50th Anniversary."

Tony proudly replied, "I'm gonna go get her."


A husband and wife are working in the yard on a hot day. They get done with their work and go inside to shower. The husband gets undressed first and gets in the shower. As the wife is getting undressed, the doorbell rings. She wraps a towel around herself and goes to the door. When she opens the door, she sees their neighbor Frank. Frank says, "I'll give you $20 if you drop that towel." The wife considers and drops her towel. Frank gives her a $20 bill and walks away. When the wife returns to the husband, he asks, "Who was at the door?" She replies, "It was Frank." The husband says, "Oh, did he give you the $20 he owes me?"


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