A New Goal!

I had a simple goal. I wanted to play in a band that was gigging regularly or that was able to get a gig - somewhere - on or around December 4, 2019, which was yesterday: I turned 50. I wanted to advertise the gig as "Come out and celebrate the drummer's 50th birthday!" I had this idea for a while and I had spoken about it with various friends. I still believe gigs that are advertised as serving a duo purpose of hearing a band and to celebrate a special occasion - such as a 50th birthday - are cool and fun. I'll take it despite its gimmicky first impression.

Today is Thursday, December 5th, 2019.

I am 50. My 40s seem like a decade ago and my 30s seem like two decades ago and my 20s seem like three decades ago.

Waking up this morning is when I realized fully and completely that I am not in a band that I described above. My "Come out and celebrate the drummer's 50th birthday!" gig has not been scheduled for this weekend. So what do I do now? Do I give up? Do I give up on myself? After all, I failed to meet my goal. It didn't happen. Does that mean I'm done with playing drums? Does that mean I am accepting the idea that playing drums in a regularly gigging band is never going to happen? Does it mean that

1. I should sell my Ludwig Vistalite drums to Luke, a drummer who works with Alex at UNI? 
2. I should accept a reality that the extent of my "gigs" are playing at 5:15 PM Mass on Saturday nights at Saint Thomas More church? 
3. I should accept a reality that I am a shitty drummer? 
4. I should accept a reality that I am not a good enough player to land a drummer role in a band?

Uh, no, no, no, no, and no. It would be too easy to give up. That's not the "me" I want to be.

Instead, here's a revision of the previous goal.

I want to play in a band that was gigging regularly or that was able to get a gig - somewhere - on or around December 2020, which is when I turned 51!